This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
