I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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