I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
