Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
