she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
