There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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