Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
