Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
