After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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