And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
