God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
