end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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