I got chris browned last night
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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