it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
You took a bar mat shot.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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