you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
should my penis look like a turkey
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
