i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize