Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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