While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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