So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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