i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I just gargled with NyQuil
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Randomize
