i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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