There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Why is there bacon in the couch?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
