i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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