She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Randomize
