So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize
