Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize