You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
oh god was she eating orange peels again
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
