My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Randomize
