Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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