I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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