I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Randomize
