my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
