We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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