Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
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