I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
