Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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