I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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