Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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