If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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