Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
