You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
All I want is dick and wine.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
