A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize