i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
