maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
