Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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