Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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