ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
