apparently the secret to your success is patron
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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