No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
