I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
